STONE COLD HAVEN

I’ve become very skilled at hitting the mute button on the remote to stop my blood pressure from rising because of sucker TV commercials. In fact, I try to break my own record of how fast I can zap the bastards off. The ones that get me the most are those that try to shop you secured loans and always start with stupid questions like “Are you a home owner? Do you have debts you want to consolidate?…” Or the ambulance chasing ones from Accident Direct or Injury lawyers for you or something like that that start with “Have you been injured at work, on the road or whilst walking in town??? We could help you make a claim!” You know them type of adverts I’m talking about…LOL!

So last week, my wife and I were approaching a roundabout and we had to slow down. My wife was driving and I was fiddling with the car Stereo trying to locate one of my favourite songs by Mwamburi – Stella mpenzi wangu (I just love the part he brings his whole clan to the airport to meet Stella his long lost love flying in from Japan and she chucks out of the plane holding a baby with a short Japanese fella following her behind…).

As we came to a halt to give way, the car behind us ploughed into us with such force I could feel the pain of the bumper hitting the ground and a woman wailing like she had just seen Elvis or something. My first thought was – “For fuck’s sake!”. I guess I was more concerned with the fact that we were going to be stuck there for a while and I had stuff to do – and I mentioned as much to my wife whose first response was to shake her head and ask if that’s all I was concerned about and pointing out that someone could be injured – or our son might have been in the back.

Well – my son wasn’t in the car and she didn’t look injured and I certainly wasn’t, and to be honest with you – the fucker behind us is the one who ploughed into us – so I didn’t see what the need for the drama about my lack of concern for injuries was. Maybe she was thinking of the screaming and wailing behind us, but honestly, not doing what I wanted on time was a bigger deal. Besides, we were literally cruising just above 0 and I really couldn’t see how it was possible for an immobile object to inflict casualties.

Boy was I wrong…LOL! Not about the casualties – but more about the state of the perpetrating vehicle. The whole of the other driver’s front grill was hanging by a thread (if you can call it that), her front bumper was on the ground full of denting and her number plate was literally under our car strewn among the broken glass from her head lamps. You couldn’t help but wish the poor lady had insurance. Actually, you couldn’t help but be more concerned for her car (not her at this point by the way), considering that ours only had minor scratches at the back – Well, they weren’t a big deal, but they looked ugly as if someone had run a key (well, a whole bunch of them) from left to right – and it wasn’t cool.

What concerned me more is that she was wailing like a baby and starting to seriously annoy with her apologies and not meaning to hit us sobs. In between picking up her number plate and having to listen to the diatribe, she crossed the line when she told my wife that she had seen us slowing down and stopping – and that was what she also meant to do…only that – she stepped on the accelerator instead of the brake.

That’s when I said fuck it – and I went back to the car. What a load of nonsense. Some people should never be allowed to drive….LOL! I carried on looking for Stella. After what seemed ages, my wife came back armed with the poor lady’s details and we headed off. Of course the drama about my insensitivity continued – but my take is simple. She was stupid – why should I be sensitive. We’re late, our car looks like a bunny boiler had given it a good going over – and for what? – Because some silly woman can’t tell the brake from the gas pedal?

A few days later, we receive a call from an ambulance chasing law firm. That’s when them accident direct adverts came to mind….LOL! How the hell did they get our number? Forget I asked, I should know better in this data savvy age of information selling. Apparently, aside from the insurance process, this company were willing to assist us in a personal injury claim.

So come the questions, were you injured? Who else was in the car? Were they injured? Yada Yada….My question to them was about their intent and how they make their money.

“Oh Mr. Stone – you get 100% of the compensation. We claim our costs from the other party and its a no win no fee arrangement”. But even after telling them no one was injured and the poor lady’s insurance company are paying for our damage they still push on and push on.

I guess you know the economy is bad when ambulance chasing law firms are willing to convince you first that you have an injury and then help you make a claim. I even asked if I can claim for the time I lost. You see, time is of value to me and I would have otherwise been doing something instead of listening to silly people who can’t drive. The answer was amusing “No sir, we only do claims on personal injury”.

I bet you these guys have spotters on roundabouts waiting for accidents and then dig your details from licence plate info – “We know you got injured sir – we were there”…LOL!

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Posted on Friday, July 3rd, 2009 at 1:09 pm
Filed underLakini some people....
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